What's a WANdroid?

Originally, a Wandroid was simply a nickname for a WAN engineer. But that term doesn't do these guys (and gals) any justice, since it implies a certain less-than-human quality. In the new millenium, WANdroids will be those low performance PCs and robotic devices that we will use to perform simple, repetitive tasks in place of their human counterparts.
Today's WANdroids are printer servers and low-volume file servers that are nestled into a corner of the wide area network, chugging away at a series of tasks, or simply waiting for a cue from someone else before moving a file or making a log entry or processing an order. With apps so thin, they can easily be run from a floppy drive or a removeable disk on a client box, allowing the sysop to do a quick swap out when an aging WANdroid finally bites the dust. Tomorrow's 'droids (--I'll drop the apostrophe from this point forward--) will be a more versatile bunch, able to tap into a system within milliseconds and provide some immediately useful services at virtually no cost.
specialist "Bender"
Specialist, "Bender"

What makes a WANdroid different from, say, a Web servers?

WANdroids work primarily by intercepting data or processing tasks from a queue. They are not directly accessible by others (save for back doors inserted by their creators). Remove the droid from the network and the data flows past the point of interception, or the queue simply fills up.
So, while a droid can act as a server, it wouldn't necessarily operate in real time. In the short term, a droid's absence may not even be missed. This would allow it to be brought offline for maintenance without affecting the rest of the network.

Why build a WANdroid?

Why use WANdroids when there are so many sophisticated devices and applications that can do the same job for you? Because most WANdroids are cheap, readily available, and don't require licensing. For example, you can use a WANdroid to simulate some functionality of a wide-area network on two or more local area networks, without giving anyone access to the WAN. (A good example of this is WANMail, a client side file transfer application.) This provides simple, inexpensive security and requires only one network software licence (assigned to the droid, of course). The trick is to give the droid limited access to a public area of each local area network. LAN users queue transactions to the public areas and the WANdroid jumps from one LAN to another, check each queue, much like a Web crawler would do. In fact, Web crawlers are WANdroids, too!
It's only a matter of time before WANdroid technology advances to the point of providing R2D2-like universal interface ports (like the USB, only not dependent on a host driver) to literally "plug in and turn on"! Techno-entrepeneurs will sieze the opportunity to develop brand new WANdroids for specialized tasks. Droids no bigger than a palmtop PC will be mass-produced to provide a host of client-side applications, transparent to the network, but essential to the user community. And, of course, the inevitable insect-sized droids will give new meaning to the phrase "there's a bug in the system".
plug-n-play "R2D2"
Plug-n-play, "R2D2"

WANdroids on the Web

I mentioned that Web crawlers were Wandroids. This becomes more apparent if you look at the Intranet as a very big WAN, and you imagine the Web crawler as an independent sort of creature that interacts (interfaces) with Web pages in an innocuous and unobtrusive fashion.
If only one useful thing comes out of this Web page, let it be the link (at right) to the index of Web "bots" -- Wandroids, all -- that you can utilize to "plug in" to a variety of sites and do your browsing for you. Perhaps, what these little workhorses need are appropriate droid "skins" to give them a little more character. (There's a free idea that you can run with, if you've got the creativity!)

Droids that crawl
(under construction - check back later)

You gotta crawl before you walk

Okay, it's not an absolute necessity to give your droid mobility. But wouldn't it be nice if the little fella' could strut right up to the interface port and connect itself whenever the mood suited it? This would be a particularly important feature in the middle of the night when the battery gets low. No more waking up daddy for a glass of electrons.
If biomechanics is not your specialty, there are a number of Web sites that show you how you can convert your Wandroid into a self-propelled automaton.

Are all droids created equal?

You can separate WANdroids into two classes: servers and clients. (This should not be a surprise to you.) The server class WANdroid offers the best opportunity for entrepreneurs and inventors. Microprocessors with self-contained operating systems and interchangeable flash cards that define specialized functionality could be created as server class droids.
Client class WANdroids offer the best opportunities for ecology-minded and financially conservative leveragers of technology. Client WANdroids are not accessed directly by any other client or server. These WANdroids are as transparent to the network as any common user, with the only discernible difference being a tepid personality.

You can be a WANdroid, too!

It's true! Take your place in droid-dom by participating in SETI@Home, a project conducted by the University of California - Berkeley, wherein your computer joins a Borg-like community of number crunchers, massaging massive amounts of data in the search for extra terrestial intelligence.
Listen!

Who makes WANdroids?

That's what I'd like to know! I invite anyone out there who has developed WANdroid technology to submit their anecdotes, for publication on this Web site. Tell us how you've turned that old 386 into a tiny workhorse on your global wide area network. Let's help build the future by rummaging through the junk heaps of the past!
If you think this is all just a lot of fantasy and wishful thinking, check out Android World. Real people building real androids!
Your ideas, your software, your custom-built hardware may spark some creativity in others, or it may prompt others to tap into your knowledge. Don't submit anything that isn't copyright protected unless you don't mind your ideas being borrowed by others.
If you're not feeling particularly creative, try watching one of those TV programs that feature behind-the-scenes looks at Jim Henson's Creature Shop. Or visit the official site of The Jim Henson Company. The unique combination of hi-tech toys and good old-fashioned ingenuity behind many of the Henson creations will someday be put to good use in the creation of robots and WANdroids that will serve the common frog...I mean, man.

The purist speaks...

The linguist in me feels the need to point out a small issue that I have with the use of the word "droid" as a reference to robots -- and in this case, computers in general -- that do not share particularly human characteristics. The word "android" refers directly to the quality of appearing human, and few of our droid friends from Star Wars and the like fall into that category. Still, with great respect for George Lucas, do I not only embrace the term, but perpetuate its common usage by creating this Web site in honor of those beeping, whistling, creaking, usually-metallic children of the human race.

Data
"Data", one true Droid